Moon basking
by Kay ti
Summary: Sakura decides to confess one night and the man in her fantasy ravishes her, until... ... My first Naruto ff! Please comment!
1. Moon Basking

Moon basking.

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That night Sakura sees him, the moon nods at passing stars while drapes of uncanny dark indigo clouds weave through the despairing darkness of the sky. Her heart skips a thousand beats and cries wolf- this time for real. The grass shuffles huskily as she approaches him; not quite. Sakura is still a sheer distance away from him, unable to move on. For many a nights she has been doing this- staying up to the hour where vampires roam freely around all to see a specific someone. At her footsteps, night fairies scatter gracefully, leaving pearl sized dew drops on the greens.

She takes a few steps forward.

Then Sakura stops in her tracks.

_No no, it isn't right_. She tells herself, a hand clutching the prickly end of a shrunken hard. Soon a dribble of scarlet etches its way guiltily down and her finger starts to hurt- a punishment for having that sort of feeling engraved in her.

That figure's silver hair gleams luminous, while the moonlight plays with his exposed skin. Sakura continues watching him, his every move, his every action, and the way he cocks his head to shake the hair out of his eyes. Seconds pass and she is getting excited. Back in the village, people are already sound asleep and at the advanced stage of dreamland. Sakura does not understand why this man is always moon basking alone. He is a man, silent and strong no one could ever guess right what populated his head during his 'deep-in-thought' mode. Fear never crossed his path during the compelling battles he laid his life for. That was one of the reasons as to why she admired him.

"Sakura, aren't you tired of standing?" That familiar deep voice startles her. She knows that he knows.

"I-I…"

"Come and join me," he nods, patting the adequate space on a weathered rock beside him.

Crickets play their fiddles and cicadas chirp to the hearty tune of past dusk, woodlore folks can be heard stomping in a hypnotic rhythm. Owls hoot and gawk in elation and the mice secured in their feet cry bloody murder.

Sakura makes her way warily over, she feels so shy and awkward. _A private chat with sensei?!_

"It is the song of the night." He says. Sakura peers at his face, the ends of his eyes crinkle up and the bump on the mask shifts. She knows that he is smiling.

"Eh?"

"When the moon comes to play, another world begins. The night is not for show and sleeping, you know."

"Sensei says that nights are for successful completion of missions."

"You don't think properly, do you?"

"I do," insisted Sakura. _A reprimand?_ The heat from her cheek rising is quickly diffused by the cool air. _Does he think I'm a doer who plainly follows instructions?_

"Close your eyes, Sakura." He says.

Sakura shuts her eyelids tight and paused. A moment of soothing silence passes. Her heart is beating faster and faster like on a marathon, when she listens to his breathing. It is stable, not in little jerks but smooth with a hustled twinge.

Finally Kakashi speaks," what do you hear?"

_Your sexy breathing,_ she wants to say.

Instead, she makes up a crap tall-tale in attempt to be a model student. "Uh, movements. Lots of them."

"Yes. Something was trivial as a movement is a big issue in life."

"I don't understand you when you speak in riddles."

"There are many arguments in life you have yet to encounter and decisions to come that may leave you scarred. When you are older, all these will comprehendible."

"Mmm…" Sakura mulls. _So he thinks I am not mature enough?_

All these time Kakashi speaks to Sakura, he does not turn to look at her. Her initial belief of him is that he is an omnipotent mysterious, in her opinion, very manly man.

"I have something to ask of you, sensei." All these while Sakura has been avoiding using Kakashi's name, so as not to get the same spasm she got many a time with his name rolling off her tongue.

"Shoot," he replies immediately.

Sakura's hands wring on her knees, while her mind wrestled with unholy questions- not like the ones "Did you have sex before?" or "In what manner do you bathe?" but more towards the innocent first love arena.

"Uh…" Suddenly, the words get stuck and Sakura flushes a waterfall of coyness.

"I already know. Love matters?" Kakashi chuckles and lifts an arm to adjust his headband. For a fleeting instance, his arm brushed against her elbow and both skin made contact by one inch of cloth.

Sakura's temperate rise degrees and she is sure she will get a fever from sitting next to Kakashi or being so close to him. In her nervousness, she doesn't answer and sees where his statement leads to.

"I'll have a word with Naruto tomorrow, if it bothers you so much. His behavior is understandable though. And during training, I'll arrange something else for him." Kakashi laughs feverishly, his Adam apple bobbing up and down as if embarking on a journey on choppy waters.

Sakura remains shell-shocked. Her back hunches and she recoils. _No, not that narutard noob!_ She wants to scream. _He can drown in the ravine and I won't lift a finger to help!_

Kakashi glances at her and sees bashfulness printed all over her face in its full glory and decides to continue his analysis which is mostly right. "On the other hand, Sasuke is an excellent student; I can see why you fancy him. His boyish smile is charming I must say and the bold passion for learning is remarkable." And blatantly telling a white lie, he says "hmm… he once mentioned he is in love with a fellow ninja mate." His voice trails off while he glazes at the distance.

"Uh… uh sensei…" She starts fidgeting. "I- I-"

The rest of her sentence is drowned by a hungry wolf's howl.

"War cry." Kakashi notes in melancholic distaste. "Or a relative died."

The solemn howling takes on a louder volume and draws near.

A human sized wolf springs out from a nearby bush and gives them an evil eye while rounding them out. The sinister eyes fix onto Kakashi's intrepid ones. Red, black, red, black, the left scarred eye flashes forthrightly. Soon the shaggy wolf lungs towards their direction and as quick as how fast mail by a ninja courier is delivered, Kakashi throws himself down on Sakura. She is still reeling from embarrassment to notice the swiftness of the action.

Bored with them and having short attention-span, the wolf huffs away, with its head tilted towards the moon in valiant.

Whilst lying on Sakura, Kakashi searches her frozen expression for an answer. "Are you alright?"

"I like you sensei." The words float out airily and casually. Relief floods her, she has said it!

"What?" He goes, his face fixed and eyes still lock on hers.

Sakura tries to read his wooden expression, but to no avail. On her own, she decides it is disbelief.

Kakashi rolls of her and composed himself. "Too late for jokes." He says and smiles at his own joke. Well, literally.

Tears attacks her eyes and Sakura tries to blink them off. "I'm not kidding. I am in love with you sensei." She repeats.

They don't speak for a long moment and listen to animals talk littering the forest.

Kakashi's voice is like a dagger swiping the stillness of their verbal confession. "As you say, I am your sensei. And additionally a sensei who is almost twice your age."

"We can still be together." Sakura pleads in a panic.

"Impossible." His answer so crude and cold, embittered with rebuff; it breaks her heart. All these while, Sakura has thought that breaking your heart was simply an exaggerated expression, but now she can feel her fragile adolescent heart crumbling into dust.

"I wanted… my first time to be with you." She murmurs, a new set of tears threatening to flood her senses and numb the hurt.

"What first time?" Kakashi demanded, his tone darting between anger and amusement. His heart trepid and edging; this was too abrupt.

"For everything. A hug, a kiss and …. much more than that..."

"Don't you have better things to concentrate on? Like promotion of ranks?"

Helplessly, Sakura gets so carried away she rambles on, adding height to her declaration. "I have been in love with you for a long time! Every time I close my eyes I see you. In the murky rain I try to catch a glimpse of your silhouette. During lessons, I write your name in my book a thousand times. Your voice is music to my ears and I drink you up like milk. No, it's not an obsession or a fleeting romance I seek but I really want you sensei!"

"Hush, close your eyes, Sakura" In which Sakura obeys at once.

Under the sky of haunting blue, the waves of darkness crash wildly together with the beat of Kakashi's heart. He isn't sure if what he is about to do is right. There is a shimmer in the air, and he knows that he is feeling the love and fondness tonight. Something in him compels him to commit the act; a clandestine love once forbidden to reveal itself resurfaces from its inner depths in spurring determination.

Slowly, Kakashi pulls down his mask, which has sealed his faced from outer elements and human eyes for many years. Inside, the contemplations and hesitations battled with each other, his mind as a war field. To that, he eschews them with a firm hand and decides to please this yearning girl. He half-heartedly hopes one day she will forget him and gets on with life. Following so, he puts a gloved hand over her eyes and leans forward.

Sakura can feel his heated hand over her eyes; she trembles slightly in anticipation and somewhat fear- afraid that he will take her immediately, as what she indirectly requested and hurt her. And then her mouth is enveloped by a foreign type of warm. It saturates her with such flippant happiness as tingles of pleasure swaggers down her spine right to the toes. Soon they are nose to nose, mouth to mouth and chin to chin; their hearts beating as one. The kiss; Sakura needs it more than food, more than status, even more than her own life.

_Kakashi's lips, so tender, soft and as sweet as honey._

Sakura moans softly as his kiss deepens into another round of hankering desire. She moans again, her gasp catches in the hollow of his throat and he laps it up. Almost on cue, Sakura's lips part and Kakashi's tongue enters her mouth simultaneously, like a frivolous puppy begging for some attention. It searches snake-like and explore the endless cave of a mouth, slithering over plateaus and gorges before playing a love game with the other red snake.

This kiss was a manifestation of his inner desires, the times when he yearns for a lady's love and concern, all those while he has wished for. Now that he gets it, the devil in him wrestles for more. Physical pleasure and unruly lust starts to plague him. With the other free hand, Kakashi allows it to wander up Sakura's tiny waist and pulls her closer to deepen the kiss, nibbling the ends of her lower lip as she tilted her head to kiss him harder- a forced kiss he shamefully enjoys. The womanly contours and curves she fashioned are alluring, Kakashi feels himself growing harder down there and reaches out to cup her behind. He discerns and tries to make light of the situation. Pleasure love is so carefree and insolent; such a forbidden rendezvous will bring joy to his cold life.

Impulsively, Kakashi slides a hand up her legs and rubs her thighs with the smoothness of a snow pear through the thin silk. He hears her gasp again and continues his exploring duties this time higher, like scaling a mountain whereby the peak was the reward. The effect shoots fireworks behind Sakura's eyelids. All the colors illumine in the static black of her eyes and furrow furiously for space. She responds to him with equal vigor, pressing herself up to him and seems to offer her body. Her hands stroke the muscular chest of his, something she has wanted to do for many months.

Sakura's eyes are still closed. _Touch me please_, a silent beg enraged with passion beckons.

The ebb and flow of their actions applies pressure to his body and soon he is moaning unbridledly together with her. One of her knees is prodding at his hardness and dragging on the sensuality of the night.

Her words "I want you sensei" keeps repeating in his mind, playing with the lust that lurks out from a corner and causes unrest inhumane growing in him. Morals soar away and fly out of reach. Kakashi burns with a need for satisfaction.

Pleasure that cunning harlot courses through his veins as Sakura's fingers inch closer to his throbbing tent. Internationally and slyly, they close on the hot bump and starts rubbing it. It is rich with syrupy goodness and he knows what he wants from her: physical love.

"Faster." Kakashi hisses, heavy on ecstasy. He pulls back for an instance before fixing his mouth to Sakura's milky-white neck and letting his hands discover pleasure on her chest. Sweat drips down profusely down his neck.

At last, that throbbing inclination comes to him, thunderous and violently. Unintentionally, he bites into her neck while emotions sweep through him like greased lightning.

_She is only a little girl!_ The agitated assertion cries out, ringing empty chimes in his head.

Snapping out of his trance, Kakashi entangles himself from the embrace that pries his aloof outer shell open and pulls up his mask panting hard from the near climax that devours his body.

"Forgive me." Kakashi bows his head, eyes downcast refusing to meet her own shining ones. Horrified with what he has done, the regret thundering upon him at his hasty decision. A pedophile! He supposes he is one. He has almost raped his student for the mountain god's sake!

"Why are you saying this? That was so amazing."

Kakashi looks up at her briefly. Her lips are the color of ripen strawberries to match rosy flushed cheeks. He scrutinizes her watching him, the glint in his eyes returning to their wintry indifferent state. Shame abates gradually but he still feels unease hindering his senses.

"Don't tell anyone about tonight." He finally says.

"I won't tell." Breathes Sakura, her heart now a raging ecstasy. Her finger flies to her swollen once-virgin lips and draws half circles on it. She sniffs the air and feels the drifting vapors in the air condense into their liquid form, cool on her warm skin.

"It was a mistake."

Sakura shakes her hard, the pink locks falling prettily by the side. "I could feel that you wanted me too… I can give you what you want and satisfy you in every way."

"Listen, we must never do that again." Kakashi can barely digest those words that were coming out from a young maiden's mouth. The whore talk is getting him appalled.

"Whhhy?" It comes out as a spoilt whine.

He pauses. "I have never liked you in that way and will never do so." And gets up, turning to leave. Kakashi is not sure if that is a lie, but for the moment the fleeting love that has once invaded his icy heart is gone.

_Not for long_, Sakura whispers and watches his tall frame disappear into the bleakness of a forest.

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_**Author says:**_

_**Kakashi's one hot-blooded male and Sakura's just a confused teen! The reason why I wrote it is because liking a handsome sen**__**ior or teacher is a rage amongst girls these days. **_

_**Hope you like this little drabble! – may want to continue….**_

_**If not, feel free to swear at me. It's cool.**_


	2. Kakashi Moonlight

**Moonlight**

**Kakashi **

Oh man, for the love of Orochimaru's lacy pantywaist, she is hot on my heels. Chasing me like silent paparazzi. When I turn my head, she's gone with the wind.

The cherry blossoms bloom early this year, and everywhere I go, I see her. No avoiding or hiding away.

The alcohol stinks my blood and here I am, hormones raging, heart pounding, hands restless, body like an empty shell yearning for casual love. My heart is also hollowed out; the hermit crab has left for a cleaner habitat, mine is crowded with filthy remnants of erratic flings. The blasé love which taunts me from one night stands disparate so quickly, two hours later, I am prowling on the streets, feeling all scratched-out like one of those un-won lottery card. I hate the loneliness I never wished to experience. It is the kind of loneliness whereby the season's festival in full fledge, and people are flocking from all directions but a part of you feels empty. This is one of the silent killers jutsu can never land a fatal blow on.

This is quite the single life I lead. The lonely path I embark since everyone died out on me. I hate the loneliness; the bane of being a sole survivor. The only pride I allow myself is when one of my students excels in his/her skills. Even a hint of it, my heart will be singing all day. Everyone assumes that I'm this aloof snowman, emotions never openly displayed. So they judge me, like we're in a judicial court. And they judge me, denounce me guilty, a sinner like Pa.

What kind of sensei, am I? This question annoys of the hell out of me.

One of a kind.

Oh yeah, I can always take on an Asuma-personality and behave like him. When Kunerai's on a mission, he swaggers to a bar, like a showy top-notch wanker, grabs the hottest girl he can find, and then whisks her off to any flashing neon-light love hotel populating the red light district in a bounty hunter- way.

Like Sasuke's flaming arse I am like that. I have my morals and ninja codes.

Well, most of the time.

So as I stride across the street, hands in my pocket, damn hot girl dangling off my other arm like she's the latest handbag, I can see _her_ from the corner of my eye. _Her_ shoulder length pink hair is sticking from the corner of the wall, each strand dyed neon in the waning moonlight, swaying and mockingly beckoning me. I can practically smell the almond scent emitting from _her_, dimming the surroundings till I see nothing but the little head from the corner.

My new arm accessory is talking dirty into my ear, things we can do at her apartment, how much of a good lover she assumes I am. Her voice is like a buzz in the deafening night. She must have picked a few techniques from Make-Out Tactics, because she imagines half-walking in those million inch long heels and half-groping my legs with her own will turn me on. She thinks these naughty things will make me horny, so we can have sex standing up in public, behind some nuclear waste-free garbage bins and the next morning she will be hooked into the phone, boasting of her expeditions and tigress prowess with the son of suicidal 'White Fang' or maybe the ex-ANBU with the special sharingan eye, she will nickname me. Eh, no. If I wanted an experienced whore, I could always get a couple of recommendations from the self-acclaimed legendary sannin.

I stop in my tracks, whip my head to glance at the corner of the street. The little head is no more there. Or maybe a pint too much has caused the illusion. By now, the girl is moaning, making low animal noises. She doesn't realize she is making a fool of herself. She is throwing herself at me like I'm this dirty old man who will foolishly take her as a mistress.

I get pickled after giant slugs of sake. My head's spinning. Not in the clearest frame of mind.

A while ago she is saying, _I am so bored_. _And you are so hot, my brain's on fire._ Her brightly colored western cocktail is swirling like any vortex in a storm. The stem of the glass clinks inconsistently with Japanese infused techno beat. I want to tell her that her parents will cry if she sleeps with men when she is lonely. There is a constant stream of cigar smoke consuming oxygen like compressed effervescent- not a place for nice girls like her. But on autopilot, I snake my sleeved arm through her slender waist and say _Come on_. A smile lights up her heavily made-up face. She grins like a kid. The twilight in the bar hides our identity which makes me relieved. For if Gai happens to catch me, he will go tsking for Konoha village. What the hell is the matter with me? I feel abused. I am an adult, a full timer on manhood tablets, and yet fearing this certified professional tskker. It's really appalling.

I ask her _How much?_ She gives me a blank look, hands stop swinging mine. So I try again. _How much?_ Her brows wrinkles. _How much for what?_ I don't wish to say it so directly, but I do anyway_. How much for you to get laid? _It is starting to sound like one of those god-damn nursery rhymes where the lyrics are annoying repetitive and dictating. _Listen, you. I. Am. Not. One. Of. Them_. Her tongue lolls comically around as she enunciates each word. I look at her snow white skin, so translucent they gleam even in the dark, thinking that she belongs to the category of older girls who fucked for money to buy imported make-up, first-grade collagen, hand-painted kimonos and twenty-thousand yen perfumed sand baths. Her eyes are unblinking. Her lips don't quiver or pout like when I was chatting her up by the bar counter. She is looking at me like my late Pa did whenever he thought he was taking me in hand_. Sorry_, I say, taking hold of her hand once again. There is an appealing purity to this game they call sex. She says she is twenty-three, like hell she is. I am a shameless philander of mobile love, it irks me I can't be bothered to put a stop to my addiction.

What does she see in me? What does little Sakura sees in me? There is a mirror placed in the hallway of the academy entrance. Normally, I would avoid it, because if I look into the slanted reflection, oh man, what I see is my questionable oval face, ruffled hair, a tone darker than the fourth Hokage's and expressionless, heavily lidded eyes. _You look sleepy_, Gai always tell me in his stern, commander-friendly voice. And he gives me the exasperated hands-in-the-air action, like I'm hopeless and far too anal to be a person. So I reciprocate his act of kindness and frowning at him and acting like I am too caught in my happy daze to engage in a conversation with him. Sometimes, it riffs me so much, I am filled with this overwhelming surge to strangle him and yell _Shut the fuck up, you walking eyebrows!_ Of course, I can't be bothered to cause mayhem like these. Even the sharps sunbeams which blind my eyes don't hide the stranger-like features in the mirror. Iruka once lamented _the way people look at you is never the way you see yourself._ There is much truth to it. I know that my face is not good-looking. There is a battle scar which mars my features and further punctuates my lack of handsomeness. Yet there are blind people who swoon when I pull down my mask for ramen.

In the bathhouse, the steam rises in humid wisps and blurs my vision. Still, I can clearly see the same sinewy abs and pedoral muscles tauter than ever, almost similar to the ones lined on my bones in good old ANBU days, only significantly larger.

If Ma was still alive, I'm sure she will pester me to get married. In my mind, my inner eyes visualize a petite woman clad in plum blossom kimono for this season, adjusting the collar of my khaki vest, smoothing the creases and unsuccessfully propping up the limp flap of my chest pocket. Although the years have taken her for a ride, she would have aged gracefully. The meanders of crow feet lining her eyes will take on a beam of soft, gentle kindness, a type of feature that can hardly match her huge voice. _Look how much you have grown, Kakashi._ As if on cue, she will ask. _Do you have a girlfriend?_

_No, Okasan_. I will reply, hiding the laugh in my voice.

_Or maybe someone you like?_ She will continue to badger me, persistently tormenting me till the gold mine has fully bled. _A lover? You can always confide in Okasan._

_No, Okasan_. As usual, I am as monotonous as before in my speech. This is so she will not take a wild guess at my tone and make ridiculous deductions like she always will.

_You should mingle around more often. Instead __of reading those silly novels, Go Go Parrots? Aren't they about mating animals? How vulgar._

_Come Come Paradise, Okasan_. I will correct her.

_Those are bad influence, you know. The next door neighbor's son Takumi read it and he had herpes on his bum. How unfortunate!_And she will do humphff-ing like a braying horse.

_No, Okasan, you got your facts wrong. He was reading the book __while sitting on poison ivy._

She will start tutting. Tutting so much she can start a tutting factory. _It's the same._

Then she will ramble on. _Eh! How about the nice girl with long wavy hair, like a soap opera actress and sparkling eyes, in the bandage dress. I think she's one of the sensei at the academy, no?_

_Her sparkling eyes in a bandage dress_? I will say and squint my eye for emphasis.

Ma will chide me. _Her body in a bandage dress, not her eyes. She's very pretty and seems to suit you. And her hips are voluptuous, excellent for child-bearing._

_K__unerai? She is together with Asuma. Practically engaged._

_Mr beardy? Oh dear. What a waste. Anyway, I was thinking, you should get married soon._

_Okasan, I'm only twenty-eight!_ In indignant, I will cry out.

_About time to start a family. __There is this girl, the daughter of one of my mahjong club friend, from sand village. This year, she will be twenty-five. She can cook, she can clean, and she does an exceptionally good job with the cleaning of the toilet... …_ Ma will drone on and on. And I will nod my head like the dutiful son she expects me to be. I won't be defiant and tell her the cleaning lady at the academy does all of the above and I'm not going to marry her. I am so freakin' glad no one knows about my inner mother complex.

The adolescent girl from the bar is asleep by my side. Turns out that she knew quite a far bit about slamming and banging. I feel guilty; it must have been one of her first time having sex. The rumpled sheets display a red spot tell-tale sign. She said she is a half-virgin. Damn right, she is. Oh man, the day I answer to her parent will be the day I commit suicide. I don't want her lying in my arms. Feels wrong. So wrong to have sexual sex with someone your heart doesn't love. It wasn't even passionate at all, huh. My head's so screwed up thinking about this.

I turn my mind to Sakura. #*!! ! It freaks me out when I realized I have been watching her every movements, memorizing the curves on her body, the intensity in her eyes when she concentrates… I need her like the desert needs water. Perhaps it's not more than a fleeting obsession, a phrase I am currently going through.

If she comes closer to me when there is nobody around, I think I will stuff a rag into her mouth and rape her. Make gentle love to her till the cows come home. And when the herd of cow moon totters their staggering way over, I will climb off her trembling, delicate frame and get Pai-kun to bring death to those bloody cows that shouldn't even be there in the first place. How dare they come without being summoned?

But I can't do all that, no?

Because I am a sensei.

Sex is not love. Sex is not love.

Then why did I fuck the hell out of the girl who is only three year older than Sakura?

Oh yeah, sex is not love.

**A/N: I'm so sorry for boring you guys with another lame chapter. I really appreciate all the reviews, I'm ****sooooo happy you like Mr Smutty story. They really made my gloomy day as bright as sunshine!**

**The kaka here, in my own opinion is like a doppelganger of Passing Strangers (Greatest naruto ff ever!)'s Kaka. But to me, this is the type of Kakashi I am keen on developing.**

**Basically, Kaka is hesitant about going**** all the way or even starting out with Sakura. He doesn't wanna abuse his position as Mr sensei. **

**Years ago, when I was 14 I had a mini weeny crush on my tuition teacher who was, let's see, I think 27??! He wasn't as hawt as Kaka though… Ahaha.. I wonder how many of you fancied/fancies your male teachers too? (^.^)**

**Please review!!! (Even if it's horrible.)**

**PS: There will be more lemonlicious chapters to come. POV is to help u understand their characters better.**


	3. Sakura Moonlight

**Moonlight**

**Sakura **

The last time I tried to hold Sasuke's hand, he pried my fingers off and shot me the iciest look. A look so cold, not even the chilliest wind can emerge victor, not even the thickest glacier can stand erect against. Of course my fragile heart, as weak as my own battle tactics, shattered.

Behind the dojo after training, I confessed my love to him. Poured out my soul. I wanted to do all that before Ino intruded and led him away from my world, brainwashed him till Sakura to him was merely a combat partner, a whisper in the wind he couldn't be bothered to strain to catch a breathe.

We stood face to face. At the turn of events, my back was to the wall, pressed up by an invincible force called fear. I had no idea what wrong I had committed. All I did was to tell him I admired him and did he want to go out. I said that so innocently. My throat was dry and voice, husky. But he heard it clearly. He stared at me as if I had committed some sort of unforgivable heinous crime. Or if I was one of the groupies who honed their talent by stalking him like bloodhounds.

Suddenly, he didn't seem so handsome anymore. His beautiful features appeared monstrous, far worse than the curse which plagued him, more terrifying than all of the looming creatures from the Forest of Death whose jarring frames lurk from one shadow to another, searching 24/7 for a prey to terrorize. The iris of his eyes lightened to a lantern-red glow, dotted comers emerged joined by a mind-map of dark lines. Sharingans glared daggers and mentally spat them out. The jet black spiky crown looked like a battlefield for a wide-spread massacre, blood tainting his murderous eyes. He must have detested me so much. Hated all of my being, to each strand of my fibre, for the expected declaration. It was obvious that I liked him. He knew it, but he had never exploited me.

_Get the hell away from me._ He said.

Words injured me. The edges, sharper than all the throwing stars ever made. So I edged away from him, kept my distance, and things went back to normal. I never recovered though.

XXX

To date, there will be two men I cannot look in the eye. The boy who rejected me so callously and the man who caressed my lips with his own and gave them new-felt warmth.

Two full weeks have passed since that fiasco, something he may call it. But I am already addicted to my first time. I want to please him so much; he won't do it with random vixens.

He has been avoiding me. I dread lesson time because training with them. As usual, Naruto is the life of the lesson. He bears immerse, never ending chakra with a little help from the entrapped nine tailed fox. As usual, I am making mistakes; the wrong angle for that uppercut, not concentrating enough on jutsu. Kakashi sensei, with a pained look the mask cannot hide strolls hesitantly over to correct me. Each move he makes within one metre of me is halted, like a slow-mo film. I know he is careful not to make skin contact with me. I know he is trying to distant himself and his heart away.

There are nights I sneak out. The moon is waned into a cresant and he hasn't arrived. Become a silent stranger at the taverns. A drift in a motion. Camouflage into the cracks if he should turn his head. I feel physically sickened doing all these perverted stalking but I know if I don't see him, I will break.

Ino calls I'm a made in china porcelain doll, that I'm worthless and fragile. The entire village is filled with girls like me. Lovelorn, shamelessly pinning, drunk in addictive desire and aching for a prince to sweep them off their clog feet. I heard that you can buy a dozen young girls for a small fortune outside Japan. What an insult.

I am afraid of what I am truly feeling. I am scared of being the only shadow I see. This is this teeny weeny itsy bitsy portion of me that makes me want to harm myself, hurl myself into pits of self-destruction. Sometime I feel my forbidden feelings for my sensei are owing to other village girls' obsession over him. At the temples, they purchase love charms with dangling red dragons for luck and scribble his name at the wooden end. With a cluster of charms and trinkets tinkling like wind chimes attached to their obi, they daintily nibble on sticks of red bean dango, making foolish speculations on what his bare face may seem like. Of course, he is too daft, in a sense, to notice childish things like these.

Love is on a run. I don't know if he believes in love. Nothing is real for him. The web of illusion he spins with his sharingan, blinds him from reality. It divides the world and his thoughts. He adopts an annoying Shikamaru attitude; he can't be bothered with relationships. He snorts at storybook values and fairytale endings.

While the moon basked on us, he kissed me like there was no tomorrow, like I'm oxygen, like I'm in control of his bodily functions, he touched me, made me grow wet down there , made me feel light as air. I told him I feel for him and I think he answered it by kissing me.

Sometimes when his body heat is closing down on me, I can feel his affection for me, so strong; it connects to my aura and sent chills down my vibes. This forbidden love enraptures me. It excites both of us; I can visibly see the rare sparkle in his mundane, dull eye. He denies that special attraction, no way is he going to shove me away with a firm hand. Because I know the day he tells me with his eyes he doesn't want me, will be the day

Nightingales stop singing.

Trees cease their floaty whispering.

Tremors rule the face of the earth.

**A/N:**

_Please review! Please review if you are like Sakura, or one of those silly village girls, hankering for a guy's attention. Cos I am guilty of my infatuation with fairytale endings and princes too. ^.^_

_Feel free to correct me should I make any mistakes. Or insult my style or slam my story. I don't mind. I really need to improve. ____ There is something clearly out of place in this chpt but I can't seem to grasp it.._


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